While heterosexual women often feel unsafe in straight bars, heterosexual male blogger Hugo Schwyzer reports no discomfort and no harassment while dancing in gay bars.
Secure in his masculinity, most of Hugo’s role models during adolescence were… gay.
Yeah, well, going to a gay bar once in a while I can understand, but what kind of straight man owns a chinchilla?
Oh Kurt, trust me — nothing like a chinchilla…
How quickly to chinchillas reproduce?
oops…
How quickly DO chinchillas reproduce?
Most of my straight male friends who frequent dance clubs go to gay clubs at least half of the time because, quite frankly, the music is better.
raj, it’s about 110 days gestation. But our girl is practicing abstinence!
Hugo, only 110 days? My boyfriend needs a fur coat!
(just kidding)
Re Michael Ditto’s comment, I’m sure that the music is better at gay clubs, but I’ve had more than a few run-ins–not with straight guys, but with women that gay guys bring to the gay clubs. I’m a bit on the small side, and, unlike the guys (gay or straight), the women seem to have no problem running rough-shod over me.
Hence, I’m not so sure about the “non-discrimination based on sex” aspect.
From the post
>Secure in his masculinity, most of Hugo’s role models during adolescence were… gay
On a serious note, I have to tell you, Mike, but the fact is that this line has been bothering me ever since I first read it. I wasn’t sure why until now. But I do now. And it has nothing to do with Hugo.
Secure in his masculinity? Give me a break. Secure in his heterosexuality perhaps. Which is fine with me. And, more importantly, portraying it as such (that is, “secure in his heterosexuality”) would be fine with me.
But, secure in his masculinity? In context, that line more than suggests that you believe that gay men are not masculine.
Mike, you might want to explore some of your own prejudices.
I can sort of see raj’s point, but I didn’t see a betrayal of prejudice there until he mentioned it. I rather see it in another sense, that Hugo was secure in HIS masculinity, that is, not feeling insecure or trying to model/emulate/mimic the masculinity of any role models. (I’m interpreting for myself, of course, not trying to explain what Mike might have meant.)
Ray | November 14, 2004 08:59 AM
>I’m interpreting for myself, of course, not trying to explain what Mike might have meant.
I know full well what Mike meant to write. But the language that Mike used was perhaps unintentially suggestive of his belief that gay men are not masculine. Read the entire sentence. “Secure in his masculinity, most of Hugo’s role models during adolescence were… gay.” What is one supposed to take from this other than the belief of the author that there is some dichotomy between masculinity and gay? I hesitate to use the term “internalized homophobia” to describe what is evident from the sentence, but I’m sure that the author understands a bit of my objection.
BTW, this issue is not that much different than the use by some gay men of the term “straight-acting” in personal ads. As far as I’m concerned, people who use that term to describe themselves so exemplify internalized homophobia. When I have seen it in a chat room, I haven’t hesitated to let them know. More graphically that I would permitted here.
“Secure in his masculinity” is a contrast not to gay people, but to the insecurity of exgays, which antigay bigots project onto gay people.
Mike: If you wish. I saw nothing in the post that has anything to do with ex-gays, though. Or in Hugo’s post, for that matter.
There is a dichotimy between gay and masculine.