Karen Booth is the leader of the Exodus member ministry Transforming Congregations who just recently led a charge to force eBay to remove the massage table “where it all happened” from auction. Today she has decided that, though she stands behind that campaign, she wishes to apologize for the way she personally treated Mike Jones in print.
I’ve decided that I want to issue a public apology to Mike Jones. (I’ve also contacted him personally as well.) …And I want to be as clear as I can about what I apologize for and why.
I am not apologizing for protesting the auction to eBay – or encouraging others to do likewise. I’ve already stated my motives for that and I won’t rehash them again.
I shouldn’t have labeled Mike as a “gay prostitute” or “male prostitute.” Jim Burroway was correct to nail me on that. I shouldn’t have made disparaging remarks about Mike’s integrity or questioned his motives. That was an ad hominem attack that has no place in public discourse.
You can read more on Dr. Warren Throckmorton’s blog where she posted the apology. Mike Jones has relisted the table and, while to avoid technical issues he doesn’t mention it in the auction, he has given us permission to convey that he will be giving all proceeds to Project Angel Heart as orginally planned.
While we still completely disagree with her stand, which elevates the value of not being offended over charity for those in need, we recognize that this apology is a positive step for Karen and encourage her to not make it the last one. Wouldn’t it be absolutely Christlike for such a ministry to have offered to buy the table themselves, thus giving help to a worthy charity and eliminating the offensive situation in one act of love? What do you think Karen?
Or if they don’t want the icky sin-table, they could offer to make a matching donation to Project Angel Heart.
I don’t think that’s really a fair thing to request. They have no reason to want the table that Haggard had sex on, no more than I’d want it. I think you should simply allow that she did apologize and not push her any further, otherwise you risk simply being facetious.
Hmm…well, this is just part and parcel of people with certain religious judgements reacting, not thinking anything trhough enough before doing so, and it not occurring to them that their actions do more harm than good.
I can say that about their entire agenda. All they see is that they CAN react without much challenge, but who they hurt is immaterial to the import of their mission.
Which they don’t seem to be too clear on anyway.
There are some strange collectors out there who like to have things associated with infamy.
They are the reason criminals can’t profit from their crimes or jail house hobbies.
Still and all, apologies rarely come from the consciouness of these folks unless there a a lot of outcry of some kind. They aren’t used to it, or avoid it.
And when they can’t do that, cry that they are the victimzed ones.
Haggard’s church owes a lot of gay folks an apology, period.
They sure begrudge gay folks more than the other way around.
David Malcolm:
You are certainly entitled to your opinion, however I was quite serious with that suggestion. I believe that would be the most Christlike reaction in this situation. A ministry would have the opportunity to demonstrate that helping “the least of these” is more important than worrying about being offended.
After purchase, they could build a big bonfire and burn the thing so it would never end up on auction again. This would spare those who were offended from having to be concerned about it again, otherwise I suspect it will end up on eBay yet again some day.
Honestly, is there really any doubt about which Christ would care the most about, having his sensibilities bruised or helping the sick and poor receive food?
I wonder why Karen Booth is raising her profile at this time and wading into these battles. I had not heard much from or about her until about 2 weeks ago. Has she just been in my blindspot or has something changed?
Thank you, Jim, for this post and for linking it to my full apology on the Throckmorton blog. I encourage your readers to take a look at that (if they haven’t) in order to get the bigger picture on my rationale and actions.
I’ll be following this thread and do intend to try to answer some of the questions raised. Many of them are valid inquiries, but I’d like to try to deal with them all together and after I’ve had some time to reflect on them.
So ask away … and look for my response by maybe tomorrow or Monday.
Kudos are due to you Karen for a Christlike step.
Again, we (maybe I should speak only for myself at this point) are always open to dialog with those who can show themselves to be reasonable. We can always disagree without sinning in doing so 🙂
Paraphrase:
I would call it a good start.
Hi Ms. Booth,
I tell you what.
I appreciate you wanting to hang out here. I’ll tell you up front, I taken a lot of crap from ex gays and I’m disinclined to trust the very ministry that enables and validates prejudice against gay people.
There is something supremacist in the vocation, and it’s an old one. There may be some repackaging, but the goal is the same.
Other people have traveled the same road to say that another human being’s color or gender or some other inborn and natural characteristic, isn’t.
And many suffer much trauma to conform.
But when God, God’s plan, God’s wishes….are invoked, this is powerful incentive.
To say nothing of having so much around you pushing you into the arms of ex gay ministries.
I know normal people can be convinced they aren’t.
I remember the time when I hated being black, and I remember who made me hate it, and I remember how much easier it seemed white people had it in life, and they do.
Who wouldn’t want to be white? Who wouldn’t want to be straight?
So, having said all that…no matter how gently the ministries say it, or how much they believe their goal is for God and Christ, the message still is…you don’t belong and you’re not normal and belonging is based on ONE condition.
These are not individual decisions without powerful, lifelong influence, which is clearly coercive.
Okay, whew…I had my say.
I don’t understand anyone wanting to buy (or sell) something connected with such infamy.
But the fact remains that Haggard wouldn’t be in his situation, nor gone to M. Jones or fallen in such a way….had he been allowed to be validated and accepted as a gay youth from the beginning.
We learn NOTHING about or from or through gays and lesbians in a meaningful and powerful way, if religious people weren’t constantly interfering with the opportunity to learn more.
Nothing is sure. There is always room to be MORE sure about what homosexuality is and who gay people are.
So now that you’re here, I’d like to learn more about you and give you every chance to just be yourself.
So, thank you for being here and I promise to be respectful. You’re new and a differing point of view is something I do welcome.
I mean that.
Thank you, Jim, for this post and for linking it to my full apology…
Credit where credit is due… And on that note, David Roberts wrote this particular post. I spoke to him by telephone before he posted it and agree with everything he wrote. I posted a similar statement on my blog.
Karen, I don’t think your apology is generous at all. You have taken the least important offense (I imagine Mr. Jones has been called worse than “gay prostitute” in his time and has managed to survive) as if anyone really has a problem with it. I don’t remember a single post here or anywhere else where the problem with your actions were the name-calling. You took food out of the mouths of the needy, and until you see that as wrong–for ANY reason–I don’t think you are truly sorry about anything.
Again, I’m sorry for my harsh words, but I think strong expressions are quite warranted in this matter.
Perhaps as a concluding thought, I just noticed that the auction has ended with a winning bid of $405. The bidding was at $1265 when Karen’s prompting led eBay to shut it down on a technicality (Mike Jones explained to me that eBay employees themselves assisted him in the placement of the item in the first place, and it was pulled within 24 hours of ending).
While I am genuinely pleased by some of what I have heard from Karen here and on Doc Throck’s site, I can’t get around the essential conclusion that Karen’s actions, at least in part, took $860 worth of food out of the mouths of cancer and AIDS patients in Colorado. And no matter how hard I try I can’t make myself believe that Christ would be happy about that.
I’m not suggesting that she do anything publicly, but if you are reading this Karen, please consider making that right with Project Angel Heart. Forgiveness is wonderful, but it seems to me the responsibility remains.
I agree with David Roberts when he asked: ” Wouldn’t it be absolutely Christlike for such a ministry to have offered to buy the table themselves, thus giving help to a worthy charity and eliminating the offensive situation in one act of love?”
Exactly!!! It would have been an act of REDEMPTION — which the dictionary defines as “the act of saving something or somebody from a declined, dilapidated, or corrupted state and restoring it, him, or her to a better condition.”
You could have taken that massage table, blessed it in the name of Jesus and given it to an AIDS hospice or other charity to provide a true healing touch to some in need. Absolutlely brilliant –and Christlike — suggestion.
I appreciate Karen’s apology… I’ll bet that Karen, in retrospect, might have come up with the idea herself i she hadn’t reacted like a grackle. (Just kidding Karen — you know I love ya!) From one grackle (me) to another. huh? We DO mean well. God Bless You, Karen.
Well, it seems sort of sad that this table has to be used as a way to support a worthy charity. Why doesn’t the person who placed the original ebay bid just donate the money directly?
Who knows. Perhaps the person buying it isn’t doing it to support the charity but because they want the table. I’m not sure I understand why even those who are offended really needed to be aware of it – no one was forcing them to go look at the auction page. If Karen had left things alone, far fewer people would have heard about it at all and the charity would have received at least another $860.
So for me, the more appropriate question is still why did Karen put their desire not to be offended above the help for a charity? And is she willing to make up the difference she is responsible for taking from them. I continue to ask because I haven’t heard any answers, much less good ones.
If Karen will make up half the difference, I will make up the other half.
Making up the difference in the auctions is a wonderful idea, and I think some of you guys should go for it. I wish you success in your endeavor, but I won’t be joining you.
As I stated above, I’ve posted my final thoughts about the auction and my apology on Dr. Throckmorton’s blog. I’m not going to rehash them here.
I respect Karen’s decision. Could someone provide the information as to where I should send my donation?
Project Angel Heart’s web site is here: https://www.projectangelheart.org/
The Donation page is here: https://www.projectangelheart.org/development/donate.htm
Karen said:
Making up the difference in the auctions is a wonderful idea, and I think some of you guys should go for it. I wish you success in your endeavor, but I won’t be joining you.
As I stated above, I’ve posted my final thoughts about the auction and my apology on Dr. Throckmorton’s blog. I’m not going to rehash them here.
Micheal said:
I respect Karen’s decision.
I don’t respect Karen’s decision.
Karen made the decision to take steps to remove a source of funds for a charity that feeds victims of AIDS and cancer. Karen has absolved herself from guilt for this action by claiming that a higher cause was served – that of protecting the feelings of Ted Haggards’ supporters.
There is absolutely no moral code – especially not Christianity – in which the feelings of the rich and powerful are to be protected at the expense of the poor and hungry. Her decision – using any known religious, moral, or ethical standard was abhorrent.
Perhaps there could have been a way for Haggard’s feelings to be protected while also feeding the hungry. Karen refused to take any such efforts. Out of a spirit of generosity, Micheal offered to make up for half of Karen’s damage. Her response is “I won’t be joining you”.
I could respect Karen if she took responsibility for her sin against those in need and pled to financial constraints or other inabilities. But instead, Karen has consistently taken the arrogant position that she has no obligation whatsoever to heal her harm.
Her attitude on this matter has been a vivid example of self-righteousness. Her behavior has been a shocking illustration of the contempt that she holds for those she considers to be her adversaries.
It is sad, but Karen Booth has provided confirmation of the attitudes that dominate the ex-gay movement – arrogance, contempt, and self-righteousness.