At someone else’s suggestion, I thought that after 3 1/2 years at the helm, I’d take a moment to say just a little about myself. Not enough for readers to stereotype me, I hope, but something more than a blank slate.
Read on:
Name: Mike
Age: Generation X (the older end of it)
Religion: Raised Roman Catholic. I was a fundamentalist in my teen years, then returned to the RCC before college. I studied Latin American human rights, culture, poverty, and liberation theology (with some degree of skepticism) during college, worked for the Jesuit Volunteer Corps after college, and later worked for Sojourners, a Christian magazine about faith, politics and culture. My closest religious affinity is now toward the Religious Society of Friends (Quaker Christians).
Profession: I have been a mainstream journalist and online content manager since 1993.
Are you exgay? I have never participated in an exgay program. I worked alongside exgay advocates in the creation and management of the Bridges Across the Divide bridge-building project from 1997 to 2001. Two exgay participants in that project, Alan Chambers and Randy Thomas, went on to become leaders of the culture war against same-sex-attracted persons and against bridge-building.
Community values: Over the years, in addition to my work for religious organizations, I have volunteered for an AIDS clinic (4 years); a rape-prevention and education program among school-age men (5 years); and the Independent Gay Forum (6 years).
Political bias: Independent. I strongly oppose the corruption, greed, lies, egotism, and ineffectiveness of both major U.S. political parties. I support the values of the libertarian movement — small government, individual freedom — while I also seek ways to preserve and promote constructive community values, environmental restoration, and a modest social safety net.
Where were you on September 11? I was in downtown Washington — fearing what new threats might lurk in the clear blue skies, witnessing the futility of evacuation by car or bus, feeling thankful for the subway, and mulling this catastrophic culmination of my lifelong fear and fascination with the Twin Towers.
I wanted to leave this speculation for all to weigh in on.
Just as many mean spirited laws that ONLY affect the transgendered, have had their post op, opposite sex marriages rendered invalid based on ‘ever being’ of a former gender (which makes their current marriage of the same gender and therefore illegal). You always are of that gender regardless of complete gender reassignment.
What if:
someone spearheaded laws that said if you ever lived as a homosexual, and/or had homosexual sex, your opposite sex marriage is invalid and was never legitimate…nor are you now a legitimate heterosexual.
The laws based on the many marriages between gay folks and their former opposite sex spouses.
One could say that such marriages are automatically tenuous and shouldn’t be encouraged based on weak science regarding the completeness and efficacy of conversion.
Would those self righteous ex gays get the point, that civil law and their choices in life are incompatible?
Would they empathize with the very people they are so very quick to vilify in courts and legislatures?
I simply see the speculation on such laws as a way to examine the purpose of the golden rule and what it really means to live by it.
Yikes, my post looks incoherent in a few places there.
Pre coffee morning posts are not a good idea for me.
I didn’t mean laws ‘based on the many marriages between gay folks and opposite sex spouses’.
I meant to say, evidence based on the FAILED marriages between gay folks and their opposite sex spouses’.
Indeed, FOTF uses ex spouses of gays to show just how destructive such unions are.
If they say you can’t trust a gay person acting as if they are straight within a marriage, then just what is the point of such marriages EVER to be legal?
How can you trust an ex gay in marriage, when that’s just what they were doing, being ex gay to begin with?
NAME: Timothy
RESIDENCE: Los Angeles
AGE: 42
RELIGION: Raised Pentecostal. Currently attend a non-denominational Christian church with a mostly gay congregation. While it lacks in some of the structure and style that I like, I support its goals of being an outreach to people who have been rejected by religion and to be as un-churchy as possible for those who fear “church”.
PROFESSION: Accountant (yeah, now that’s some excitement).
ARE YOU EX-GAY? Nope, never was. When I was a teenager I prayed that God would make me hetero. Finally, it became pretty clear that God’s answer was “no”. So, instead, I decided that I would just stay in the closet and never have any romantic life at all. That got me through college. Finally, I read and studied a bit more and determined – in this order – a) I am the way God created me. If He wants to punish me for being how he created me, then he’s cruel and capricious god and I won’t worship such a god [I’ve been thinking lately about whether if I was born into a radical muslem sect, would I kill innocent people for my god or would I question whether I was worshiping an evil god… more on this another time]; b) the interpretation of Scripture on this one point – and on quite a few other points – seems arbitrary and not logical, with church leaders selecting Levitical law for me to follow but not for them; c) the whole focus on “not sinning” had taken the church away from the commandments of Christ. Jesus said we could tell his followers because they were focused on caring for the physical needs of others and the “sin warriors” don’t show much interest in that. In my current limited understanding, I worship an amazing and wonderful God that is far more interested in seeing me grow spiritually and in my relationship with Him and with other people than He is in seeing me conform to selected Levitical prescriptions.
COMMUNITY VALUES: In college I was involved in everything, the fraternity system, College Republicans, student government, etc. Since then I’ve been involved off and on with Log Cabin and other local gay or civic organizations. Currently, I’m pretty low key and don’t take an active roll in anything other than writing here.
POLITICAL BIAS: Old school Republican. My ideology runs libertarian, limited government – local rather than central – and individual freedom. I support some of the direction of the Republican party such as a strong national defense system but reject other directions such as their current obsession with the minutia of peoples’ lives. I find the current administration particularly disturbing because it seems to have little regard for individual liberties, behaves arrogantly, and rejects the small government / limited central control concepts that the party professes to believe.
“a) I am the way God created me. If He wants to punish me for being how he created me, then he’s cruel and capricious god and I won’t worship such a god [I’ve been thinking lately about whether if I was born into a radical muslem sect, would I kill innocent people for my god or would I question whether I was worshiping an evil god…”
Posted by: Timothy Kincaid at February 25, 2006 02:13 PM
Its occurred to me that the encouragement of martyrdom in Islamic countries may come about as a means of intentional disposal of same sex attracted male youth. The young gay is taught fulfilling or talkig about same sex attractions is unacceptable but that such attractions can be fulfilled in heaven and one can go to heaven by becoming a martyr and killing the “enemy”. Had I been raised in radical muslim sect I can see how in my younger days with testosterone when I was angry about being same sex attracted how that might have had an appeal to me if manipulated craftily. I wonder how many Islamic suicide bombers were gay youth who had to choose between a lifetime of fear as a same sex attracted person and fulfilment of those attractions in heavon in exchange for a shorter life.
Posted by: Regan DuCasse at February 25, 2006 01:17 PM
Regan, seems to me that if the anti-gay exgays want to say they can change and marry straight then it follows that they should support the idea that transexuals can change too and marry straight (according to the gender changed “to”) as well. The major difference being in that the “straight/exgay” relationship one is trying to go against the attractions one feels naturally while in the straight/transexual relationship one is going along with the attractions which come naturally.
Name: Christopher
Age: just shy of 32. yawn.
Religion: I was baptized Missouri Synod Lutheran, but when I was four we moved to a suburb of Chicago from a suburb of Philadelphia. My father (an Iowa farm boy) thought the Missouri Synod church in our new town was too fundamentalist. (All that praise Jesus stuff doesn’t go over well in proper Iowa farm towns. Or at least it didn’t.) So, we switched to my mom’s church (she was raised by atheists but became Presbyterian (USA) in College. I was very active in Church youth groups. And started getting a little too fundamentalist, when I started giving speeches at my High School about abstinence. My mom had a conniption and so I backed off. Then came out. And slowly moved away from even Presbyterian (USA). Most recently I’ve been a member of Unitarian-Universalist congregations. Although, I haven’t found a specific one that I like in a few years. Since the churches are in the Congregationalist tradition, they tend to vary a lot between congregations.
Profession: Graphic designer and a video and performance artist
Are you exgay? Not even. I came out when I was 15. My parents thought I was too young and sent me to therapy and battled me over it for several more years. But eventually, they came around. My only brother is also gay. Although he didn’t come out until he was 27. At least to them.
Community values: In college, I did a lot of journalism and design/production. While also being involved with hunger/homelessness organizations. As well as Democratic Socialists of America. I was involved with the Queer Student Union and Multi-cultural Facilitators (seminars for first year students). I’ve been involved with a lot of queer youth things. Serving as a facilitator for a gay youth group in Charlottesville, Va. Worked with Q-Action in San Francisco. I tested positive 10/18/1999 and since then have been involved with a group for positive youth and later as a facilitator for a positive men’s program with Stop AIDS in San Francisco. I am in a binational relationship (he’s from Japan) and so recently have been volunteering immigration and marriage equality.
Political bias: When I lived in California, I had the luxury of saying I would “not declare.” And still have some options to vote in primaries. There isn’t even a section for that in Washington, DC. So I’m registered as a Democrat. I’ve moved to the center some since college. But I like to say that I’m a “Leftist that hates the Left.” I believe in socially oriented government — national healthcare, public schools and parks, public research funding. But I also think government should work well to encourage private innovation.
Where were you on September 11? I was in Oakland, Ca. I had gone to school in the morning and was turned away because “there has been a terrorist attack in New York.” I was more than a little dismayed at my fellow Northern Californians that I felt were making a bigger deal (and playing a little bit too much of a victim) than the situation warranted. Especially, considering my friends that were IN New York. Went about their day, attended meetings, finished classes at NYU and later in the day walked home. That part about Northern Californians being a bit wimpy and New Yorkers being tough as nails hit home for me that day.
Article in the Saturday (Aug. 5, 2006) Salt Lake Tribune:
https://www.sltrib.com/faith/ci_4138478