In 2002, K. Godfrey Easter wrote Love Lifted Me: In Spite of the Church about his experience as a gay Christian.
He has now written Love Lifted Me Because of the Church: Why One Can NOT Be Gay & Christian reversing his position and claiming now to be ex-gay.
He explains his reorientation as:
“All I can say is that inside me, the instant love cataclysmically collided with wisdom a great separation took place – me from homosexuality. In his second book, Easter continues answering, “God did it! I was drawn back from perdition by love’s long-suffering and wisdom’s seductive allure.”
Easter only sold about 5,000 copies of his first book. Visitors to his website are now encouraged to buy both books for comparison’s sake.
So he wants you to get double the books?
The sad thing is, somebody’s gonna buy ’em.
This sounds more like an attempt to sell books than any real change one way or the other. The sad thing is this guy will probably get all kinds of PR in the media, from Dobson’s crew, etc. They eat all this up.
Speaking of Dobson, his new anti-gay website is running ads on Oprah and Dr. Phil in the NYC area:
https://www.goodasyou.org/good_as_you/2005/11/focus_on_the_fa.html
Wow. From his website:
“As the captain of this train ride into a ‘whole-nuther’ realm, Easter guides readers through rough terrain. “Once we’ve reached a comfortable cruising speed start digesting my first book, “LOVE LIFTED ME: IN SPITE of the CHURCH.”
But the author forewarns readers that they might experience motion sickness if they’re still seduced by the bland taste of the ‘sincere milk’ of God’s Holy Word. This particular odyssey, especially the second leg of the journey (his second book due out this upcoming February), has been divinely orchestrated as a Word for meat eaters, first and foremost.”
Huh?
He also says his book will reveal “Why the Christian body still baffles with this stronghold.”
How did this pompous butcher of the English language get TWO books published?
Not quite sure, but it looks to me like maybe the books were self-published.
Can this guy’s story be validated at all (either the gay side or the ex-gay one). It sounds a little fishy to me.
Either he is a really quick writer about some really deep issues, or he was already writing his new book as the old one was being published. To have such a huge worldview change in such a short amount of time seems way too convenient.
Sounds to me like an advertising stunt to sell a few books. I’ve never heard of him before, and probably never will again.
One obvious question: are there any semen stains on his Levis? How does anyone know whether he ever was gay?
Perhaps he needs to read Escaping God’s Closet by Bernard Mayes. And you know? Get over himself.
I don’t think the issue is so much was he ever really gay (most people who are straight don’t write books about being gay and christian and have photos and old pro-gay press releases available on their website), but what does he really mean when he writes:
Again, this seems to me just another change in beliefs about the rightness/wrongness of being gay, but not a change in orientation. While I realize that’s the popular definition of “ex-gay” within ex-gay circles, it’s not my definition of ex-gay.
It’s interesting to read his old press releases and also his son’s version of things.
Although I was for many years safely camouflaged within my heterosexual facade…”But now, a slap of paint and, umm, what exactly do we have now? That’s an ex-gay? Or was he ex-het, then gay, then ex-gay? Next what is he going to claim?I not even going to bother. Only one thing remains — same old, same old, “Jesus Freak”. I cannot wait for his next exciting installment.On second thoughs, yes I can.
Brett,
I read the quote in your post a little fast –
it scanned first as
“As the captain of this train ride into a ‘whole-nutter’ realm. . .”
Make his extra crunchy!
Christine, I read the son’s version of things. Whenever I read a Christian’s account of demons lurking about, whispering things in their ears, it reminds me of two things: Jack “Haw, Haw, Haw!” Chick and Carl Sagan’s brilliant book, “The Demon-Haunted World”. Diametrically opposed and irreconcilable worldviews.
I left a comment on Foster’s blog. He’s got an article on this subject too.
He’s objected to my leaving overly long comments when he’s asked me not to.
What’s interesting is he didn’t call me a liar or mistaken in what I said.
The other ex gays so expert in their lives never ask me anything.
But Foster did.
It was his bigotry test for me regarding who can speak more authentically on ex gay lives, ex gays themselves.
To put it simply, I responded by saying that ex gays become that way through threat, coercion, mental and emotional exhaustion and isolation.
One’s sexual orientation (gay or not) is a powerfully inherent aspect of what one is, not just what they do.
And to abdicate it isn’t natural, but mostly a part of religious discipline.
There is no medical, scientific or socially necessary reason for it.
I told him that I hated the prejudice and restrictions that create ex gays, not ex gays themselves.
I answered his question and answering a complex issue isn’t easy to do with short answers.
He and Throckmorton or Chad Thompson or Alan Chambers or Joseph Nicolosi have as yet to answer ANY of mine.
I’m ALWAYS ready to answer a question. Not just with my opinion, necessarily.
But with empirical and historical facts.
So far, these men only have their opinions and prejudices to speak for their feelings.
This same topic here is on DL’s mind.
He’s only concerned that there is prejudice here against Easter and that what you say is gossip.
As a straight outsider, what I see here…is a serious flip flop and Easter is talking from two faces.
And talking from two faces is worthless to good deeds and tends to nourish evil intent.
Whoever is willing to say anything to me at all, helps me formulate my responses in the political and media arenas I am in.
This is helpful intellectual exercise for me when I speak in anti hate scholarship.
Root causes, historical context and political influence are important to this discussion.
Many that say their advocacy for ex gay therapy and conversion is purely compassionate, ARE involved in the political processes to exclude gays and lesbians from free and legal pursuits that heterosexuals have.
For gay men and women to pursue them also isn’t unethical or anti social.
This makes what conversion supporters (straight or ex gay) say their agenda is, complete liars.
This clearly makes them anti social justice, anti compassionate and anti human rights.
Your opinion on how I think about this is welcome.
I couldn’t agree with you more Regan. Its an unfortunate fact of life that it takes time to reason out fairness with specific examples. That’s why the books of justice are many and long.
Throckmoron, Nicolosi, Chambers, Foster, et al prefer to deal in sloganistic abstracts because they sound good superficially and they don’t want to allow longer specific debate which they correctly fear will show how specious “change is possible” and other abstract lies of theirs are. They won’t respond to you because they sense their blindly adhered to positions won’t stand up to the reasoned scrutiny and real world examples they see you will put them through. Deep down inside, in a place they don’t want to go, they know self-conflicting religious ideas of morality don’t look too good contrasted with the golden rule: “do unto others as you’d have them do unto you”, “Fairness First”, “do whatever you want but hurt no one”. Religion should be about doing the right thing – not about blindly living your life the way someone with a vested interest in dominating you tells you to.
Regan, I appreciate your efforts “over there”.The problem you face is that DL is a thug. Plain and simple, a thug.That, and the fact he’s the type of person that thinks he personally channeled Jesus through the TV. So, an aggressive personality with a tenuous grip on reality. Nice combo.But in reply to his question — and I notice yours to him remains unanswered — no, an exgay is not the most qualified to talk on the subject if they are a notorious liar and spinmeister.I do note the irony that DL feels qualified to talk about someone’s 10-year gay relationship, despite the fact he never ever even got near to having such a thing (even by his own surreal testimony).A work of motherly advice about thugs: when they start getting drunk, you leave the bar. And avoid dark alleys on the way home… 🙂 Unfortunately for us, this town has no sherrif.
Regan, the fact that DL Foster and the others won’t one-for-one trade questions and answers with you is a dead givaway that they aren’t sincere, honest, or confident in their rationales for opposing GLBT freedom to live as we choose.
A sincere honest one-for-one Q&A trade is the foundation of the family and the bedrock of society. Its at the heart of all legal proceedings, fairness, and agreement between individuals. The family is made up of individuals and with no agreement between individuals there is no marriage, no family, and no civilization. “Focus on the Family”‘s and other’s talk of “family values” is a way to scapegoat gays and emphasize the true meaning of “family values”: a white heterosexal male controlling everyone else as inferiors. Conservative as in conserving the power imbalance of patriarchy. Its no surprise to me now that none of the anti-gay fundamentalists I had email exchanges with would make a committment to fairness, equality, or a sincere one-for-one Q&A exchange. However, I now take it as a sign of hope that none of them would openly oppose those things either.
Christine – His reference to his orientation “change” being similar to his neighbour quitting smoking may provide some insight into what is going on with this gay/”exgay” author. He talks of wisdom catyclismically colliding with love – it sounds like he’s done what I’ve seen many people (myself included) trying to quit smoking do: Make an intellectual decision that they are no longer attracted to cigarettes and hope by throwing themselves into that idea with gusto the mind will overcome the desires. It never worked for me or any of the people I saw try to overcome cigarette desires with a delusional idea that because one has adamantly decided to “quit” and is not currently feeling a cigarette attraction that this will continue. Quitting smoking was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, I tried very hard repeatedly going back and forth to cigarettes. No doubt that is partly what is going on with some “exgays”, too bad for them that sexual attractions are much more integral to people than cigarette smoking.
Thanks gang!
Understand this is new territory for me. Trying to get the ex gay mind.
I thought there was an opportunity and tried to take it with Foster.
He’s now decided that I am a bigot.
My last post is the observation (as a married straight woman) that anyone who changes up for personal expediency, then works to hurt who they used to be like is a traitor.
And for this, I don’t blame how gay men and women feel.
That’s as if I conveniently got breast implants, then constantly berated and worked to keep other women from having them. Even women who’d had disease or some other incident compromise their natural breasts.
That would make me an awfully nasty person of dishonorable character wouldn’t it?
That’s what ex gays look like. They’ve traded to a brutal and unnecessary political contract with those they didn’t have the stones to fight themselves.
This is strange behavior to someone like me, for someone who claims they have gay friends or some compassion for gay people. I am an outsider, but pretty good at analyzing things.
I guess Foster was someone I wanted to try and talk to because he’s the rare BLACK ex gay out there on the net.
The most annoying thing about ALL ex gays-they are condescending to strong, challenging women.
If they truly believe the party line about ‘dominant mothers’ creating their homosexuality, then I’d be anathema to what they’ve been conditioned to believe.
The psychiatric community, a hundred years ago, was very much against women who were not delicate and who were formally educated. Women who were direct and ambitious were discouraged and considered bad for children and the cohesion of the family.
The mothers or women were often blamed for problems in the family…and still are if they dare to have intellect, ambition, powerful jobs and influence.
The ex gay belief system displays much of this attitude towards me.
And I’m certain now…any other woman like me.
You’d think they’d be eager to answer my questions, if they are SO convinced of what they do and that it’s right.
I’m learning all the time gang.
And I thank you for letting me participate on this blog. And for writing your wonderful emails to me. You all rock!
Foster clearly doesn’t want me around stirring the pot. Even if THAT’S woman’s work!
Grantdale –
Ah, you spotted my post!
Yes, I do still try to play picador
over at the Corrida de Psimo – the
futility of trying to engage the good
Reverend in rational discourse occasionally
discourages me, but when people of good
will ignore people of his ilk, cultures
do not get any healthier. And I want my
son to grow up in a country where people
with Rev. Foster’s views seem as important and
relevant as Dudley Pelley or Westbrook Pegler.
You smokers out that that have tried and failed to quit, give it a whirl next time – Just tell yourelf: If I believe real hard I won’t have a craving for a cigarette ever again then I won’t. Now tell yourself “I am COMPLETELY Changed. I HAVE quit!”
See how that works for ya. Isn’t that what’s going on with some of these back and forth exgays like this author, John Paulk, the leader of the exgay minstry who did “touch” therapy, and so on?
They may be sincere in their desire to quit, but like a smoker that uses the claim to have quit as motivation they are often caught sneaking cigarettes on the sly. The difference being monogamous gay sex is no more dangerous to your health than monogamous straight sex.
Hi Robert,Yeah I saw it. I miss a lot in this World, but have an annoying knack of spotting gaps in info or logic. Your question was just begging DL to step on the do-do. He didn’t fail.Personally, I’m still waiting for him to explain away St. Paul’s words about slaves obeying their master. It comes right after Paul’s words (some say) about homosexuality. But since he deletes all our awkward posts, I’m fairly sure we won’t be hearing from him about that subject.As raj would say, DL’s got a gig (for now). It’s a rather sordid way to make a living, but it doesn’t take much to separate a fool from their money.Hope you enjoyed the surprise dinner :)(And so glad to see the kid/s are encouraged to cook — it’s a skill that never goes amiss).
Just to point out, I call it a “gig” in large part because more than a few of these talk-show hosts in conservative (“right wing) talk radio are former disk jockies from top-40 AM radio. With the demise of top-40 AM radio, they had to re-invent themselves. Some of them were successful–Rusty Limbaugh was one of them. Most of them weren’t, but some of them are still trying.
A different medium–talk radio–and a different gig.
Hi gang!
I’m getting a ‘gig’ too. I’m not too sure how much time I’ll be able to spend with you. Having been published in newspapers analyzing hate issues has gotten me some cred with communities needing an ‘outsider’ voice.
I wish actual ex gays had been more cooperative.
It’s very strange for people to not talk to you or help you, then get pissed when you draw your own conclusions from their behavior.
I’ve spent years trying to have a conversation, some sort of exchange of information.
You all here have been the most forthright, intellectually honest and open.
My purpose has been mostly to find the bridging factors for both sides to find some common ground.
That ability has been utilized in institutions like the Simon Weisanthal Center, and Fringe Benefits Theater,a group that tours schools (nationally as well) and helps facilitate understanding among young people.
All of this is non demoninational, inter cultural and all inclusive.
I’m being given some opportunities to do a lot more of the same with bigger outlets(NOT self published or with singularly agenda driven organizations.)
Being divisive is certainly NOT a part of who I serve.
And a stage play that I wrote is looking to be a very strong enterprise and I’m not used to how something like this has it’s own engine and if I’m not careful, will take off without me.
Anyway gang, please keep sending me your thoughts in your emails.
Anti hate scholarship and outreach is my life and isn’t always easy or fun…
I have to do it though and I can’t imagine NOT being involved this deep.
If it takes me away from XGW for long stretches, just know I”m out there doing my woman’s work.
Regan, I’m sorry to hear there will be less of you on XGW. I had a look on DL Foster’s site yesterday and left a few posts he didn’t have the courage to display. For starters I don’t have to reconcile my sexuality with my faith because fairness is my faith and my actions are in keeping with that. The hypocrisy of his bigot test made me laugh. He complains about people presuming to speak for exgays instead of letting exgays speak for themselves. Then he has the arrogance to try to speak for all gays by saying gay relationships are all about sex. When a reader pointed out that isn’t true, that his relationship is about more than sex DL changes the subject and says whether sex happens once a year or 10 times a day its wrong. I asked him to take his own bigot test and answer who is best placed to say what their gay relationship is about, that particular gay person or him? Obviously he was afraid to answer. I pointed out that in my relationship sex is closer to the once a year mark and if there was any less sex there’d be none at all – obviously my relationship with my boyfriend wouldn’t have lasted several years if sex was the only thing holding it together. DL’s ignorant and arrogant statement that its all about sex is obviously wrong and he should take his own advice and stop trying to tell others what their lives are about.
“Exgays” are best placed to speak for themselves, assuming they are being honest. Society punishes same sex attractions and this gives “exgays” strong incentive to lie about their same sex attraction to both society and themselves. Gays acknowledging a same sex attraction are unlikely to be lying as they have nothing to gain from such a statement and much to lose.
The height of hypocrisy is him complaining about people calling him names in their posts and then he does that to you. As Grantdale said, DL is an agressive bully with a shakey grip on reality.
Congratulations Regan, and hope it all works out well.I’m sure you’ll be missed here, but our loss is someone’s gain. Please do let us know what you’re up to when you’ve settled in.And remember… don’t do a DL or a Chad or a Randy or a Melissa on yourself. You got the gig because of you views — don’t ever fabricate your views to get the gig 🙂
Regan, let us know where we can follow your wonderful postings. Your style and voice will be much missed here.
I think the main problem people are having with DL comes from people paying attention to DL. Watching a train wreck gets gratuitous pretty quickly, and DL’s the kind of person who thrives on any kind of attention, positive or negative.