A panel called “Being Gay in the Orthodox World: A Conversation with the YU Community” was held on Tuesday at Yeshiva University, a prominent Orthodox Jewish college in New York City. The event drew about 1,000 attendees. Although the head of YU spoke out against even the idea of such an event, many people attending were outwardly supportive, if not tolerant, of the gay Orthodox Jews who spoke.
The hope was not that people would change their hearts and minds about halakha (Jewish Law) – the hope was that people would attend and see that queers are not an abstract “other,” but in fact are fellow human beings who are much more similar to straights than different from them. Gay men and women in the Orthodox Jewish world have a growing number of resources available to them both online and in New York City, YU’s home. Many are compiled by the Gay and Lesbian Yeshiva Day School Alumni Association (GLYDSA), an Orthodox Jewish group that is located in NYC.
An unofficial transcript of the event can be found at “The Curious Jew” blog, and several videos of the event were posted at “Tirtzah,” a blog for queer frum women.
Great article Emily! As one who falls on the side B issue of this topic I absolutely agree that it’s always beneficial to have an event which helps others see that those who are gay, particularly if they have religious convictions about it, are just like them in so many respects and it helps take away the stereotypes and prejudices many have about same sex attracted individuals. I am in the evangelical world myself and only a handful of my friends know about my ‘secret’ and that’s because too many are still unprepared or most don’t even know that some of their friends, whether single or married, experience romantic feelings toward the same sex. Slowly I am hoping to change that by becoming more transparent myself. Thanks again for posting about this event.
Wow…
Thanks for this Emily. It seems that Jews are more open to being educated by and experienced with the gay members of their community.
Rather than reject the idea of even having discussions with gay people on their feelings, goals, intentions and hopes, there is a clear understanding of the importance of integrating with gay people to get to the truth.
Where I volunteer at the Simon Weisenthal Center, I remember when PFLAG was invited to speak, participate in the full spectrum of educational materials the Center has to offer.
Still, it seems that such things shouldn’t require fanfare or a scheduled set aside event, but a factor encouraged by normal, integrated and supportive everyday congregation at home, in the classroom or temple.
These are the places where anyone’s sense of self, family and community are formed.
The set aside announcement exacerbates the ‘otherness’ and ‘outsider’ status that gay people are forced into.
Still, it’s a bigger step taken than ever before. The Orthodox family next door to me have moved to a bigger home, they just had their third child, a boy this time and I can’t have the easy interaction I got used to in these last two years.
They are a VERY gay friendly couple (most of the other tenants are gay) and the rabbi had started working with jail inmates in rehab programs.
Whenever we had conversations about civil rights and gay issues, they were always very supportive, even on marriage and especially open military service.
Still, it’s refreshing that this convergence happened, it’s a step. After all, I’ve seen enough people talk about gay people without bothering to invite them to the conversation. Especially if the discussion was on laws that would directly and ADVERSELY affect gay people.
I have a quote I got from a friend, and it’s a truth that is hard to dispute.
“Prejudice usually can’t survive close contact with the people who are supposed to be so despicable, which is why the propagandists for hate always preach separation.”
Pat Califia
Can I get a witness?